Sunday, March 30, 2008

Time Goes By, So...

Well, it depends. Time can fly, and it seems to go faster each year as I get older. My theory on this is, that the less of a percentage a year is in your life, the quicker it goes by. Think about it, and get back to me. Anyway, when I'm waiting for something...time drags. It is slower than molasses in the wintertime. When I have a ton of stuff to do, if goes by faster than a barefoot rabbit on greased griddle in the middle of August!

Right now, I find myself in the unique position of having a pant-load of things to finish by a quickly approaching deadline, while at the same time, corresponding with someone new and exciting that may become a headliner in what has become the tragic story of my life. Now, in some incredibly bazaar way, time seems to be crawling and flying at the same time. Impossible you say! People said time travel was impossible, and look at us now! Okay, bad example, but seriously...How many times have you been in the shower, and completely lost track of time? You just have no idea whether you've been in there ten minutes, or thirty five. That's when it happens, time is added or taken away depending upon the opposite of whether you need more or less. The French thought they had solved this problem by simply cutting showers, and baths out of their daily, or weekly routines, but it didn't help, it just made them foul smelling. The truth is anytime you experience this "lost track of time" feeling, is when the adjustments are being made. In my case time is being added and taken away because I'm both waiting for something, and up against it, to complete some projects.

Studies have shown that 75% of all water related activities are time altering. A watched pot never boils, never...experts agree that that is dramatically slower than normal.

Time, or the passing of it, has also been linked to aging in three separate university double blind studies. This study was conducted by the blind, because no one really wants to see the effects of aging, and they also wore blind-folds to ensure that any sudden regaining of their eyesight would not influence the results. This is the most reliable way to collect data. The findings have been conclusive, time is a relentless son of a bitch, and you shouldn't be wasting reading drivel like this!

Is this actually true? Only time will tell.

25 comments:

Debra Kay said...

Time, hey buddy, can you spare some time? Half Time (what the hell does THAT mean?) Time to make the donuts....

Debra Kay said...

Oh oh oh-Parsley Sage Rosemary and Thyme. Ok I'm really done this time.

citizen of the world said...

Time defnitely is speeding up as I gt older. Except when I am bored or anxious. Good look on the new person - hope it becomes more than a correspondance.

Dr.John said...

I had a long comment planned but I don't have the time to write it as I have to rush off.

Wieneke said...

I am very glad that you took the time to write this post and that I took the time to read it carefully. Take care, RM, long after you are gone the work is still there. Go en sit in the sun for ten minutes.

kj said...

today i will make time, have time, lose time, and juggle time. i'll do this because you've got me thinking!

one sure sign of contentment and creativity is that you lose track of time in the doing.

for me, it's all about flow and rhythm. that's what i hope for in my days. it's rarer than i wish, but that's where happiness sits in my corner of the world.

good luck too on the new person. i can't resist a bit of advice: i'm wishing you a GOOD FIRST DATE, forget life changing for now!

:)

RED MOJO said...

debra kay, How about double-time. That's what they say in the military when they want you to run. I would think that would get you there faster, and should be called half-time.

cit, Exactly! Thanks.

dr.john, Welcome, Thanks for stopping by.

wieneke, yes the work, the work!

RED MOJO said...

kj, I'm sure that's somehow coming from my story of when I was 16? I have learned a little something in the past 30 years, but thanks. I'll try to harness in any crazy fantasy of this going beyond one date.

VE said...

I like the part in Amelie where the lady is getting all her life's sleep in one go. Imagine all the time you'd have if you didn't have to sleep. I would imagine the midnight to 6am stretch could be incredibly quiet and productive for those things you've always wanted to do. Alas, we'd all die young doing so though because the amount of sleep we get has been linked with longevity. I've sort of moved beyond it all. I don't stress over time anymore; I know it is what it is and there's really nothing I can do about it so I just enjoy the moment. I think it's really kept me from aging a lot as a result.

kj said...

ooops. no, i wasn;t thinking about your age 16 story at all and i didn't mean to imply you haven't learned anything since. i was more sharing what i finally learned along the way.

advice is hereby retracted and replaced with have a good time....

RED MOJO said...

kj, thank you!

RED MOJO said...

ve, wise words indeed, from my usually amusing but somewhat pensive today friend.

charlotta-love said...

Time is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer it gets to the end, the faster it goes.

Dorky Dad said...

Kind-of makes wasting time all the worse, doesn't it?

RED MOJO said...

charlotta-love, Excellent analogy! A gold star for you!

Dorky Dad, You mean because it's like toilet paper, or because it messes with you?

Quickroute said...

Time is Money!
Therefore no time = no money!
But Money = The root of all evil!
Therefore Time = The root of all evil!
I have time to make up this crap, but I have no money and am not evil
Conclusion: Sorry no time for that right now!

tsduff said...

Time -
Time spent with my Sweetie is like one breath - in and out once and it's up.

Time -
Time at work goes ticking by, one long stretch at a time...

Time - my children go from babies to adults - in the blink of an eye.

Time is a complete mystery. Great post.

Anonymous said...

A pinch and a punch! I'm a day ahead of you and know the answer! Hhehheeee

RED MOJO said...

quickroute, logic at it's best!

tsduff, mysterious indeed!

anon, you do?

Slip said...

I am living the slow crawl of time as my retirement date nears! Holy frickin- fudgebuster I still have to work four more times. It seems like a year ago I had eight days left to work.

RED MOJO said...

slip, lol, I use that expression all the time, in fact now I just say HFF!
Four days is a long time! Hope you make it.

heartinsanfrancisco said...

So what cool drugs are you on?

I'll have what she's having.

Anonymous said...

That was yesterday! Time flies!!
*flapping away*

RED MOJO said...

heart, All I can tell you is they're timed-realease capsules.

anony, It's still today here, just like it was yesterday.

Ces said...

It's time for me to go to work... again!